7 Things I'm Appreciating This Summer

This summer is going along swimmingly.  The kids are 4 and 6 (almost 7) so we're well clear of "baby baggage."  Meaning if we want to go somewhere, we just grab some snacks (and pjs if we'll be out late) and go.  We don't need diaper bags, and planned itineraries, with foreknowledge of all stops between A and B usable for nursing, changing, or just strollering around a baby who's been fussing for ages. I guess this is the first thing I'm grateful for!

• Living where I live - meaning both in Kingston, and in my neighbourhood.  There are tons of events in town during the summer.  Most of the stuff we check out is free, but there are so many interesting things going on we really have to pick and choose what we want to do!  Also we live about 10 minutes from downtown.  This means I get to work quickly and easily, and we can decide whether to do Movies in the Square with only a little lead time and we still get a good seat.
• My clothesline - I know it's corny but I love hanging our clothes outside.  We put up a new section of fence earlier this summer and now I have a nice long clothesline that helps my clothes dry and feel fresh.  Also the kids like to help by handing clothespins and such and soon they'll be able to reach and hang stuff themselves!
• My kids senses of adventure - We took an unplanned hike (quite rugged terrain) and the girls loved it!  They want to do more.  And they want to go to Wonderland and try the rides.  And they like seeing things in the theatre - live plays and stuff (as well as any movie).  I wouldn't say they're thrill seekers, but definitely up for new experiences.
• The weather - Also a corny thought, I love that the weather is always changing.  I love the hot days that I can justify sitting around reading my book, and I love the rainy days that water my gardens.  Watching storm clouds roll up and being outside watching the lightning before the rain.  The other day we had an amazing deluge and then a fantastic double rainbow.  It was beautiful.
• My family - If it wasn't for them (immediate and extended) I wouldn't be able to do as many cool and interesting (to me!) things in my life.  I love that my kids get lots of time with grandparents and aunts and uncles - it gives them different experiences they would not necessarily get with us, and teaches them to be flexible and to learn to obey other's rules.  If any of you are reading this - I appreciate you more than you know!
• All our friends - separately, and together, you have made our live easier and more fun.  Thank you to our neighbours who do look our for our kids and property; my co-workers (who I consider friends) for listening to me, and sometimes joining me, at local events, concerts and attractions and I am so amped up to visit; my mom friends, who I don't see as much as I'd like, but I know you're there if and when I need you; and our random backyard barbecue/cottage/after-event friends who are always up for a good time, kids included.

I know there are more things I'm appreciating this summer, but that's a long enough post for now.  What are you enjoying more this summer?  Anything I miss?  Post it in the comments, and stay tuned for more random mom posts! ;)

Toodles!

Making (And Keeping) Friends Through All Stages of Life

I find the act of having friends changes many times through life. Is anyone out there still friends with kids from Kindergarten?   I'd guess very few. I used to think I was not good at making friends, but I've since decided that's not the case. Sometimes the people you think you want to befriend are not the ones you should befriend.

It took me a long time to figure out who I actually wanted to be friends with in high school. Turns out who I thought I liked I didn't connect with. The problem turned out to be me. I didn't know who I was, so how could I know who to surround myself with? Once I embraced my quirks and individuality I found those people who liked me for me (and my quirks!)

Now that I'm a grownup and a mom, I feel friends are much different than when I was a kid.  I had a collection of highschool friends, then University friends, and now, while I still talk to some of those past friends, my friend requirements have changed again.  It's easy to be friends at school when you all have classes together, or live together, or share teams and other interests.  Once you are truly on your own some of those friendships are hard to keep alive.  For me, I moved into marriage and kids which left some of my friends behind.  They were on the same path, just lagging a bit further behind than me.  Also I moved apart from my friends - even thought we are still in the same town we are scattered around so we don't bump into each other without significant planning.

Once you throw kids into the mix, all bets are off.  I chose to breastfeed, which means being with your baby 24/7 for what feels like ever.  In reality it's like 4 months until baby can sleep for a long stretch or be more amused by other people, before mom (milk factory) can escape for a bit.  I think it's normal to lose some non-parent friends at this stage.  You're not in the same life phase, and oftentimes they just don't get what life is like with kids.  But you are also in a perfect place to make new-parent friends.  They can be found a playgroups, libraries, daycare centres etc.

Right now, in my life, I have very few friends that I see socially.  I'm 35, married, 2 kids ages 4 and 6, working 30+ hours per week and blogging.  There are a lot of people I think of as friends, but the categories they fall into are more co-worker, neighbour, and friends I talk to online but rarely see in person.  And then, of course, there's my husband who's my best friend, and the friend I spend all my time with. :)

I try to plan and coordinate events or things to do with my friends, but life is busy for everyone.  Now that my kids are finally out of toddlerhood and are happy with Dad or babysitter putting them to bed, I'm finding it easier to get out more.  This Friday night I'm going to a concert - but likely by myself as I haven't found that perfect music-loving friend that would enjoy it as much as me.

Not sure if there's a moral to my story, but I've always been interested in the social changes people go through in life.  Anyone out there have any other thoughts on making friends throughout life?  Or tips for maintaining friendships through the busy stages of life?  Please leave a comment if you read this all the way through (it's a long post for me!) and share your friend-making stories.  Hope you enjoyed!

Toodles!

Neighbourhood Community

I live in a very nice neighbourhood.  There are lots of kids close by for my 2 girls to play with, there is a park across the street, and most of the people are friendly.  I really enjoy being in this area of town.

My next-door neighbours (we live in a semi-detached, so my attached neighbours) have sold their house.  I'm a little apprehensive.  I quite enjoy the neighbours we have now and I can only hope the next ones are as nice.  The girls are excited to see who moves in as the two boys next door are a little older (8 and 10 ish) and they are loud in their home so we hear them sometimes stomping up the stairs and such.  I tried to warn the girls that the next people may not be any quieter.

The bus for the girl's school stops on the street behind us so we have to walk halfway around the block to catch it.  One other girl from my daughter's grade 1 class gets on with her, as well as 2 brothers.  The parents are so nice and try hard to be friendly and chatty at the stop while we're waiting.  Sadly the 2 brothers are also moving out of the neighbourhood after this school year, but in the fall my youngest will be starting school also and maybe there will be other, younger, children close by starting as well.

I find it funny that each street has it's own complement of kids who play together.  Sometimes Emma (my eldest) goes around the corner to play with the little girl in her class who gets on the bus with her.  Around there she would play with about 5 kids of various ages and who go to different schools, but when at home playing there is one "best friend" girl who lives across the street and then 2 regular other kids who play with them, sometimes adding a couple older kids who live further down the street.  Mostly the kids on our street do not mingle, or maybe even know, the kids on the other street.  Also the boys next door have a group of kids they play with who don't really intersect with the kids my girls play with.  Childhood friendships can be quite intricate things!

I wonder if part of the separation has to do with the "helicopter parent" generation versus the "free range" idea of parenting.  I have no problem with Emma (who is 6 1/2) walking around the corner to play with the other kids or crossing the street to go to the park unsupervised, but that was how I was brought up - go play until the streetlights come on mentality.  I know parenting has changed, but my personal belief is that they world is no worse now (crime etc) that when we were kids, it's just that hear about every single thing now that media forces everything into your face over many many technology platforms.

My hope is that my kids have a fun and memorable childhood like I did, and that I can let them be independent and safe at the same time.

Toodles!